Transitions

The kids have been in school for a week now.  Mick was supposed to start taking the bus this morning, but it never came, so I drove him in like I had all last week.  It will be here tomorrow, they say.  I was lying in the hammock this afternoon, waiting for the bus with Colleen, Shane and Megan to arrive.  The hammock is in the front yard, and other than the mosquitos, it is pleasant to swing there, between the trees.  I really like our house - I like our yard.  We've needed to mow only 3 times since we moved in, since the front lawn is mostly moss, with all the trees.  We are having to clean and vacuum the pool more frequently, since the acorns and leaves have started to fall in the back.  I am sure it will be beautiful when the leaves start changing colors.  More yard work, to be sure, but fall has always been my favorite season.  We'll be closing the pool in a week or so, although the kids have been swimming almost every day.  I am happy here.  Truly happy.  I just wish everyone else felt the same way.  Timmy came home and asked to check his email this afternoon.  When he discovered that his friend from NC still hasn't answered his many emails, he got all upset, and said he's worried about his friend, and wonders if they aren't friends anymore.  He had a rough start to 7th grade this year, although he did say things were a little better each day.  He hasn't made any friends yet, other than the son of our friends in Fredericksburg, who he does not get to see that often.  I have a meeting with his teachers and the school psych on Wednesday to discuss his performance so far this year.  I hope it goes well.  I have told him that we are all here (to include the school staff) to help him succeed, but that he has to ask for help if he needs it. 

My husband says he misses Camp Lejeune almost every day.  He has applied for a position with the Secretary of Defense, which, if he gets appointed, would likely mean much longer hours, and more work.  He doesn't feel as if he has enough work to do now, and he feels that this would be a more personally rewarding job.  I hope he will get it,  or something like it, if it would make him happier here. 

My oldest daughter and I had a bit of a heart-to-heart this evening, which has been a long time coming.  I so want these last few weeks before she leaves for Denver to be a peaceful, enjoyable time for her, and for us.   

My second daughter is getting grief from a girl from NC, who is basically trashing her to her face (via myspace) and behind her back at the high school.  Molly does not need this, has not asked for it, and is pretty disgusted with the whole thing.  I am glad she does not have to go to school with this girl, but she still hasn't found her "place" at her new high school.  She does have a new friend, a boy who lives 45 minutes from here.  We've met his aunt and uncle, who he lives with on their farm.  He is a nice enough kid - great with our kids, and they are a decent family.  I have tried to caution her about keeping things light, because I can tell that he really likes her a lot.  He has been a good friend to her, and that is what she needs right now.  Tom and I have had the Harry and Sally conversation about boys and girls being friends - Molly and I maintain that they can be, Tim takes Harry's side.  Either way, we are trying to keep the lines of communication open - Molly understands things best when you are direct and blunt.

Jack is enjoying his new school, and he has not had any trouble with the homework load so far, nor is he dragging his feet to go to school.  He gets off the bus with a smile on his face everyday and that alone is worth the tuition!

Megan, Shane and Colleen are fine with school, too, although they have a little more homework than they are used to.  Mick did come home on the bus today, and the driver told me he was a little shy with them.  I don't think he understands why he has to ride a different bus than his siblings (they go to a different school).  I am sure he will get used to it in time, but it made me a little sad that he might have been feeling nervous, or uncertain.  That is so not like him - the kid who waves to every passerby!  Good news is, he is doing well using the potty - for the most part!

I justwish I could somehow give my family the peace I feel with our new home, and this life.  I know that I probably have it the easiest - the changes for me have, for the most part, made my life easier (no more social or support obligations), and more fun (a house I can enjoy making our own).  I didn't have to switch schools, or jobs, and the friends I left behind are still in touch.  I am not embarking on any life-changing events and I don't have to worry about my career, or deal with the hassles of commuting.  I do, however, have 10 people I care deeply about, most of whom are struggling with this adjustment in one way or another. And, as a wife and a mother, their struggles are mine.  Their hurt is my hurt, and I wish I had the words or the wisdom to make it all better.