Monday, April 2, 2007

Raising Large Families in a Culture that Doesn't Understand

This article, by Gerald Korson,  appeared in the March 25th Issue of Our Sunday Visitor.  I thought it was amusing, and so very true..........

Raising Large Families in a Culture that Doesn't Understand

Here's how society's perception of family size appears from our side of the the maternity ward:

Child No. 1:  In today's culture, everyone is entitled to have a child.  No problem there.  It's a birthright.  It can be a boy or a girl- it doesn't matter/

Child No. 2:  You're allowed a second child, as long as it's the opposite gender from your first.  "How wonderful!  You have one boy and one girl," we heard when our second child came.  "Now you can quit."  Quit?  At 25 we're done having kids?

Child No. 3:  The culture allows you, if you insist, to have a third child, but only if you failed to get a matched set with the first two.  Call it a mulligan.  If you have two girls, you go for a boy: two boys, and you're after a girl.  If you blow it and get another of the same, too bad.  You get no more do-overs.

Child No. 4:  Now you're just getting ridiculous, especially if the kids are close in age.  You're officially christened "Fertile Myrtle" and "Virile Cyril".  Knock it off.

Child No. 5:  People begin to suspect you are nuts.  Or just plain irresponsible.  Or both.

Child No. 6:  The diagnosis is confirmed.  Besides, a family of eight is simply impractical.  Most minivans seat seven.  Now you need a full-size van or nine-passenger SUV.

Child No. 7:  By now, anywhere you venture as a family, you are inevitably asked, "Are they all yours?"  Take no offense.  Between day-care field trips and the proliferation of blended families, it's actually a legitimate question.

Child No. 8:  Since No. 5 you've been hearing that timelessly coarse quip, "Don't you know what causes that?"  You have permanent teeth marks on your tongue from trying to suppress snappy sarcastic replies.  (One wouldn't think of making rude remarks about fertility to couples with few or no children.  Why are large families fair game?)

Child No. 9:  Neighbors, strangers, and even a few well-meaning friends have pretty much given up on you long before now.  They compare your progeny to sporting events: With 9, you've got a baseball team.

Child No. 10:  You've gone American League and added a designated hitter.

 

"Feedback is not all negative.  Many people appreciate large families and readily tell you so.  Large families present both challenges and benefits.  Couples with large families aren't necessarily better parents, better Catholics, or more blessed than others.  We're simply blessed in a different way - and, like all persons of faith, we are called to raise up our blessings for the greater glory of God."