To New Orleans

My husband and oldest daughter are on their way to New Orleans, where she will be working for Habitat for Humanity. She has been home for just a little under one month, since graduating from her year with Americorps NCCC. Her new job will be for 10-12 months, and she will earn an additional education award, finishing with almost $10,000. for college. We are so proud of her! Mostly because she is taking the initiative, the "road less traveled" and doing something good for others. It is demanding work, the pay is minimal, but those things don't matter much when you are 19 and idealistic! She is getting a clearer idea of what she wants to pursue afterwards, and it is all good.

When we were discussing her trip to her new job, my husband and I agreed that one of us should accompany her down there. We bought her a used car, and she is still a relatively new driver, and it is 17 hours away. I loved the idea of driving with her, and having that time alone with just her (a rarity in a big family!). She has matured so much this year, and it is exciting to hear about her adventures, and to have some insight into how she views the world. It is still hard to believe that she is on her own. Wasn't she just a curly headed 2 year old who knew all the "Bob" jokes? When my husband was able to coordinate his schedule so that he would have the next two days off, he said that he would be the one driving with her. When I told Katie this, she said, "Why doesn't he stay home with the kids so you can come? Just tell him you want to come!" I explained to her that he is the better choice in case there was a problem with the car, and that she'd be safer with him, too. I also knew that he would be out of his mind worrying about our safety if he was staying at home. She told me that nothing would happen to us, and that I should just "Tell him not to worry." I was flattered that she wanted me to accompany her, especially since she has a better relationship with him than she does with me, but I told her that he knows what is best, and that in a marriage, sometimes you have to concede to your spouse, even if you don't necessarily agree. She said something to the effect of, " That won't happen in any marriage I'm in!" Which made me laugh.

One of the things that I love best about my husband is that he puts his family first. And he takes care of his girls (including me). I don't mean to imply that we can't take care of ourselves, or that we are weak helpless females. Just that he feels and acts on his responsibilty to be the head of the house, the protector and defender of his family. So much like my dad was that way. I have known him for 25 years now. He is the most honorable man I know. I have never questioned his devotion to me or our marriage or our family. And when you have that, it's no big sacrifice to let your spouse take the lead, or have the last word. Trying to explain that to a 19 year old is challenging. My hope is that one day, she and my other girls will find men who are even 1/2 as devoted as their dad is to me, and to us. If they are that lucky, they will be happy!