Dressing for the occasion

My baby turned 3 last Friday! Shane will be 8 on Easter. One of Kiley's presents was a dress to wear for Easter. Shane said, "Kiley, on Easter, you can wear your Easter dress, and I'll wear my Birthday Suit!" He did not understand why I thought that was so funny. Should make quite an impression at church.................I hope it's warm that day!

Clowning around

So today I got a phonecall from Mick's substitute teacher. She told me Mick was under a table in the classroom and he wouldn't come out. He was laughing and sticking out his tongue and being generally silly and obnoxious and hard to handle. She said she told him she was going to call me, and when she told him I was on the phone, he came out from under the table and picked up the phone. I asked him if he was being naughty, and he said, "Yeah". I told him he needed to listen to his teacher, and that he needed to tell her he was sorry. I heard him say "Sorry" to the teacher, and he gave the phone back to her. When the bus dropped him off this afternoon, the bus assistant told me he was licking his shoes, and was that OK with me? Um. Not usually. Unless of course, he has stepped in some particularly delicious melted ice cream or something.... ugh. So, he went to his room and had to stay there, without an audience, for 15 whole minutes before he could EAT (which is his absolute favorite thing to do in the whole world!). I do believe these silly spells are worse than if he was throwing a fit or having a tantrum, which he rarely does. It is hard not to laugh when he is performing these antics, because he can be funny. For about 30 seconds. But the noodle legs and the silly stuff gets old fast. Knucklehead.

Aging ~

I was paying for a sport's lace for Megan's glasses at the exchange yesterday. I heard the cashier say to me "Do you smell bad?" I gave her a blank (if not slightly dismayed) look, and when she returned it with the same look, I realized that what she had said was, "Do you need a small bag?" Megan and I were laughing as we left, and I was more than slightly relieved when Megan said she had heard the same thing. Because, hey, first it's bifocals, next the memory goes, and then the hearing. I am three for three.

SNOW!!!!!

Lots of it. Feet and inches worth. 4" from a record for Northern Va, in fact. I used to love snow. And snow days. That was before I had 9 kids. That translates to at least 18 pairs of boots, lots of mittens/gloves/hats. Wet socks, and snow pants in every size. Mick has been wearing pink snow pants with purple boots. Not because these are his favorite colors, but because they are what we have that fit him. The kids will have racked up at least 8 days off from school if they go back on Tuesday. Word is that they might have to go on President's Day. The state does not have enough resources to handle this much snow, so many of the side streets have not been plowed. Fortunately, our street is a bit of a thorough-fare, so they plowed it relatively quickly, this time. The school's parking lots have yet to be plowed, and the side streets are not safe for buses. We have all been watching way too much TV and spent much too much time plugged into our various electronic gadgets. The power went out for four hours a few days ago. We kept a fire going in our wood burning stove, cooked hot dogs on top of it, and we all played charades and hangman. It was fun, and made me realize that we don't spend nearly enough time doing fun family things. My husband has been off for the last couple of days, and will be off tomorrow. Since there is no snow predicted, the driveway has been shoveled, and the temps should be ideal, we agreed to get out there and really play with the kids in the snow tomorrow. After all, this is a historical event! I will not stress about the wet clothing or the puddles on the floor, and I will remember what it was like to be a kids and just play!

TAPS....

My husband came home one day last week and told me that he had just heard that a Sgt Major he knew had lost both of his legs in an IED accident in Afganistan just before Christmas. The next day, he called me from work and told me that a Sgt who had been on his provisional security detail team during his last deployment to Iraq, was killed in Afganistan that day. This same Sgt was on site when the Sgt Major I mentioned was injured, and was credited with saving his life. Right now, my husband is in New Jersey, at the wake of the young Sgt, and will attend his funeral tomorrow. Next week, he will go to Bethesda and visit the Sgt Major.



So much of what is in the news seems surreal, until you can put a face to a name of one of the fallen. Sgt Hrbeck and his wife were married at our unit ball in 2007. They were with us at the restaurant the evening that I blogged about on Feb 11 of 2007. They were friends with the couple I wrote about on March 7 of the following year. My husband thought highly of this young Marine, and his passing hit my husband hard. In reading the memorial site published in Sgt Hrbeck's memory, it is plain to see that he was a fun loving, hard charging Marine. And a true hero. In their grief, I hope his family will find comfort knowing that he died doing what he loved, and that his life, though short, was a gift to all who knew him.

New Year, New Post

I did not realize that I haven't posted a single entry since September. My life is so boring and routine, that there has been nothing to write about. NOT!

On October 17th, I re-joined Weight Watchers. By December 17th, I had lost 20 lbs. I am more than happy about this, because that puts me just a little below the weight I was when I lost 20 lbs in the spring/summer of 2008, having gained 17 lbs back between fall and winter of the same year! I am doing the Firm workouts consistently, and determined to reach my goal ( 13lbs to go) by this summer. How nice it would be to not have to keep my towel right by the side of the pool so that I could drop it and pick it up before anyone can see those parts of me which need some work!

Speaking of the pool, we had a fire in the yard in November. One afternoon Jack had put the previous evening's ashes from the woodburning stove in a cardboard box, then put them in one of the trash cans. I went to pick Molly and her friends up at the shopping center a mile away, and when I got home, the trashcan was melted to the ground, there was a huge hole in the one next to it, and the leaves between the fence and the pool had caught fire. When the fire was put out, two of our bushes were toast, about 1/2 of the pool fence was melted, as well as part of the pool cover, which also damaged a small section of the liner. There was a small melted mark on the bumper of the van that was parked in the driveway, and the headlight is bubbled from the heat. I can't even complain about the damage that was done, because it could have been so much worse: if the fire had started at night, the van would probably have burned, catching the garage on fire (including Tim's Jeep). As it was, we didn't have anything damaged that can't be replaced (thanks to homeowner's insurance!), and no one was hurt. I am waiting for the pool guy to come and write up an estimate for the insurance company. We will likely get a new pool liner and hopefully, a better pool cover, when all is said and done.

After all of the testing Timmy had done, besides the dyspraxia, (which the school psych does not believe contributes to his school difficulties), they have determined that he has a processing disorder in math and written expression. My frustration with their "conclusion" is that he has a couple of years' worth of documentation to substantiate that, but only after more testing, have they decided he qualifies for special ed services. I have a meeting with his teachers and the special ed rep on Thursday to approve and implement his IEP. I do hope that this won't be another long process when he starts high school, but I am glad it is official.

We are waiting on the military Top Level School Selection list. If my husband is selected, he is hoping to get school at Quantico, which would make life a whole lot easier for him, at least for the year he's in school. He would hope to get a follow on job at Quantico, too, which could keep us here for at least another 3 years, after which he might consider retirement. It is the nature of the military that it seems like there is always a list we are waiting for - school, PCS orders, promotion, etc. Keeps things interesting!

Dyspraxia

My child could be the poster child for Dyspraxia. I don't say this as a joke, but with great relief! I had a follow up appointment with the neuropsychologist to discuss Timmy's testing results, and dyspraxia is the diagnosis. I went home and googled it, and can't believe someone else didn't see this sooner. Why didn't I? Maybe because I had never heard of it before, but with the number of symptoms that he has, the neuropsych said it was an easy diagnosis, even before the testing - since he had so much previous testing and his standardized school scores were consistent over the years. So here I am, relieved that we have an answer, and beating myself up just a bit because I feel like he could have, should have, gotten help much sooner than now. I emailed all his teachers yesterday and sent them links to read about the condition (which isn't as rare as you might think). I heard back from a couple of them, and they are supportive. I am as optimistic as I was when he was diagnosed with ADHD - finally.........answers to why my child is so different, and seems to have to work so much harder than the others. This is what I found, the most applicable to Timmy are highlighted:

Dyspraxia
What it is called matters far less to the child than does the understanding and help from those around him/her. Whatever it is called, Developmental Dyspraxia causes disruptions of major proportions in the lives of those whom it afflicts and of the families and world around them.

Definition
Developmental Dyspraxia (also known as Developmental Co-ordination Disorder, and the Clumsy Child Syndrome) is a neurologically based disorder of the processes involved in praxis or the planning of movement to achieve a predetermined idea or purpose, which may affect the acquisition of new skills and the execution of those already learned. More specifically, it is a disorder of praxis, or the process of ideation (forming an idea of using a known movement to achieve a planned purpose), motor planning (planning the action needed to achieve the idea), and execution (carrying out the planned movement). Dyspraxia may affect any or all areas of development - physical, intellectual, emotional, social, language, and sensory - and may impair the normal process of learning, thus is a learning difficulty. It is not a unitary disorder (like measles or chicken pox, where all those affected share a common set of symptoms), and affects each person in different ways at different ages and stages of development, and to different degrees. It is inconsistent, in that it may affect the child one day but not the next - as if sometimes information is 'put away in the wrong drawer' - and it may affect children in different ways at different ages and developmental stages.

It is a hidden handicap as, under normal circumstances, children with Dyspraxia may appear no different from their peers, until new skills are tried or known ones taken out of context, when difficulties may become apparent. In many affected children, Dyspraxia occurs with or as part of other neurological conditions ( in his case, ADHD and Sensory Integration Disorder) so that defining common symptoms may be confusing.
Moves Awkwardly
• constantly bumping into objects and falling
• associated mirror movements, hands flap when running or jumping
Poor Fine Motor Skills
• pencil grip
• use of scissors
• immature drawings
Laterality Still not Established
• problems crossing mid line
• children often referred to speech therapist
Sensitive to Sensory Stimulation
• high levels of noise
Limited Concentration
• tasks often left unfinished"


• • Poor posture and fatigue. Difficulty in standing for a long time as a result of weak muscle tone. Floppy, unstable round the joints. Some people with dyspraxia may have flat feet
• • Poor integration of the two sides of the body. Difficulty with some sports involving jumping and cycling
• • Poor hand-eye co-ordination. Difficulty with team sports especially those which involve catching a ball and batting. Difficulties with driving a car (my chauffeur days are far from over)
• • Lack of rhythm when dancing, doing aerobics
• • Clumsy gait and movement. Difficulty changing direction, stopping and starting actions
• • Exaggerated 'accessory movements' such as flapping arms when running
• • Tendency to fall, trip, bump into things and people
• Fine motor co-ordination skills (small movements):
• • Lack of manual dexterity. Poor at two-handed tasks, causing problems with using cutlery, cleaning, cooking, ironing, craft work, playing musical instruments
• • Poor manipulative skills. Difficulty with typing, handwriting and drawing. May have a poor pen grip, press too hard when writing and have difficulty when writing along a line
• Inadequate grasp. Difficulty using tools and domestic implements, locks and keys
• Difficulty with dressing and grooming activities, such as putting on makeup, shaving, doing hair, fastening clothes and tying shoelaces
Poorly established hand dominance:
• May use either hand for different tasks at different times

Learning, thought and memory:
• Difficulty in planning and organizing thought
• Poor memory, especially short-term memory. May forget and lose things
• Unfocused and erratic. Can be messy and cluttered
• Poor sequencing causes problems with math, reading and spelling and writing reports at work
• Accuracy problems. Difficulty with copying sounds, writing, movements, proofreading
• Difficulty in following instructions, especially more than one at a time
• Difficulty with concentration. May be easily distracted
• May do only one thing at a time properly, though may try to do many things at once
• Slow to finish a task. May daydream and wander about aimlessly
Emotion and behavior:
• Difficulty in listening to people, especially in large groups. Can be tactless, interrupt frequently. Problems with team work
• Slow to adapt to new or unpredictable situations. Sometimes avoids them altogether
• Impulsive. Tendency to be easily frustrated, wanting immediate gratification
• Tendency to be erratic have 'good and bad days'
• Tendency to opt out of things that are too difficult
Emotions as a result of difficulties experienced:
• Tend to get stressed, depressed and anxious easily
• May have difficulty sleeping
• Prone to low self-esteem, emotional outbursts, phobias, fears, obsessions, compulsions and addictive behavior

"The frustration of having the answers in your head but not being able to get them down on paper must be enormous, but for most children all that is needed is an understanding of the problem and extra time in exams, perhaps the assistance of a reader or the use of a computer. Without those, they are at a huge disadvantage."

Side note: Spell check doesn't recognize the word "dyspraxia". There is currently more information and support in the UK - It is my hope that this condition will become better known so that the other "Timmy's" out there can get the help they need, and not have to wait as long as he has for someone to understand.